We are also seeking wisdom for ourselves to know what to and not to say. These sessions are very limited. We need God to prepare the couple and work in them.

After this I begin with questions on how they are doing as a couple. Some couples might be shy and not be open about their disagreements. Probe a bit deeper into their answers until you get to know the couple and can know their situation.

This lesson is largely focused on basic communication skills. One has to see whether the husband talks and, if so, how much and about what. I also make sure that the couple talks in the right way, without criticism and arguing.

Some counselors openly say that arguing is good. It is not. Yes, arguments get the issues out in the open, but it does not do it in a proper way. And besides, there are other deeper issues that are hidden behind the now anger-covered scenes.

Time Distribution:

Get further acquainted; Check on past assignments (10')

Check on their buying the book and starting to read (hopefully together). See if the husband led a Bible study or prayer time with his fiancée.

Finish lesson #1: The Design of Marriage (5-30')

Don’t skip this section. Finish it next session if need be. In any case, briefly review it. You will need to keep coming back to it.

Discuss any Homework (5-10')

- Any forms from last week? (You can discuss them during the lesson or now).
- Get and read the book?
- Read God’s Word and pray together...

Further discussion can be found in the book along with all the customizable handouts and activity forms.

You can order the Building a Great Marriage printed seminar materials including handouts at the BFF Resource Center. Or even bettr get the BFF Marriage Training Library which includes the Christian Premarital Counseling as well as all of our many marriage resources like this book and its powerpoints, handouts, audios and videos.

Let's see what is involved for the couple to make good decisions without tension. Next ->