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The Big Race |
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1• The Struggler Isolation compounds the struggler's problem. He has enough problem with his heavy load of guilt. But this isolation is a clever technique of the evil one to have one think that you alone are inferior and can't live the proper life expected of you. He takes the failures of sexual self-control and combines it with this thought, "I alone have this problem" lie. This produces a near deadly drink which we are too quick to take. |
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| You are apt to have many questions, but please follow through step by and step. There will be opportunity for you to ask those questions at a later period. | ||||||||
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| We will deal with this guilt later, but for now we must take an antidote for the poison of hopelessness. Without hope, we have no way to take steps to improve our situation. This is the reason hopelessness is the greatest threat to all recovery. In the next section we will more clearly deal with the reason we can find hope for our distressed situation. But before we go on, let me mention a few thoughts specific to your situation. Find a Confidant Of course, if we could just get rid of the problem, then we wouldn't need to tell anyone! But you are stuck with the lusts, at least for now. Part of the temporary solution to break this chain of hopelessness then is to find a confidant that can pray for you and keep you accountable. You must make sure this support person is not a softy. He is not one of these people, paid or not, who only listens. Don't talk to those who believe that you have the solution way down deep and will arrive at it just by hearing yourself talk! Life is a spiritual battle. You want some like a friend or a pastor. You will need to tell your spouse at some time, but this problem can be overbearing to them especially if it is kept a secret. They have a concern for your welfare and believe you can by God's grace do a better job at fighting your lusts and exercising self-control. Spouses should be one of the strongest support people we have because they so greatly need you to win. Humble oneself In order to break this chain to secrecy, we need to face our shame. This is probably the hardest part of all the struggles and where many decide not to go on. Here we face our pride. The fact is that if we are driven by sexual lusts then we are manipulating people for our own usage. We are not loving others but using them. This issue is worsened by wondering whether you will be outright rejected by others. Although this might happen, your willingness to deal with the situation will most likely bring greater trust. Just remember, bring out all the stuff. Honesty breeds trust. Part of this honesty is the truth about our own lives. The truth breeds humility.  |
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